Friday, April 1, 2011

Drumroll, Please

Here it is, the moment you've all been waiting for. I know, right? The one line, super-duper pitch for The Treasure Hunter's Lady, fantasy-historical romance:

A cowboy willing to risk his life to keep a promise; a woman bold enough to uphold her values; a legend that will bind them together.

Written in honor of the contest at Shelley Watter's blog. And I feel pretty spiffy because I now own a one-line pitch. Whew, it took several hours to come up with it, but it was a great challenge. At least it didn't take me days. You should see some of the other stuff I came up with!

Snakes in a cave. 'Nuff said. ;)

16 comments:

  1. Well done. Intriguing and interesting and well written. You got a lot out of 140 characters. :)

    I'm in the contest too!

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  2. I think you did a great job of hinting at conflict and character in so few words.

    Also, I seriously thought, for maybe the span of a few seconds, that 'Snakes in cave.' was your pitch LOL

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  3. I like this a lot. Like Lori said, it hints at conflict and character, and is enough to hook readers. I know I'd give it a try!

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  4. I'd probably like it better if it was a complete sentence, but I'm definitely intrigued. It leaves me curious about the cowboy's promise, and I can't help wondering which legend you're talking about. Sounds like a fun read! Nice job.

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  5. I like the intrigue you create, but I don't know the stakes for the heroine. I know the cowboy's life depends on a promise, but I don't know what. I'm also not sure about the last part because it doesn't give me any specifics on the legend.

    Overall, the mood of your pitch is great, but need more details to flush it out.

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  6. Very intriguing! Though the sentence fragments are somewhat jarring, I think tied together, they work pretty well. The only phrase I didn't really get was "a woman bold enough to uphold her values"--what makes it so dangerous/risky for her to uphold her values? What are these values, and how are they threatened?

    I hope that helps!

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  7. I like how concise this is. Great work!

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  8. I'm with Tina on this one. It's good but I think it needs to be flushed out a bit more. It could be because its in fragments not sure.

    Tweek it a little bit. I'm intriqued but feel like there should be something more.

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  9. I like it a lot; but I feel like something's missing. Good job though! Good luck in the contest! :)

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  10. simple and effective, the only way it could be better would be to add snakes in a cave :) i am ready to start reading this book right now my wife and son are already asleep on the couch!
    douglas esper

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  11. I really like it. Its vague enough to make me ask questions, but specific enough that I wouldn't change it. Great job and good luck with the contest!

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  12. I like it, but have a tweak suggestion for the last fragment. ...and a legend that binds them together

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  13. I like it. Good luck
    Robin Delany

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  14. I love western romances! I want to read it. You only hinted at the characters and conflict but it worked. Good luck!

    Please come to my blog and comment on my pitch I'm still working on it.

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  15. This is great because it gives the setting, the conflict, and the romance. All in 140 characters! Well done.

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  16. I think this is great and you can save it as your backcover blurb ... well done and good luck :)

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