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The Friday Five - Too Bad To Be Real

I have to go visit the in-laws Friday, so you get TFF two days early. It's like Christmas a month early, huh? Maybe you should reserve judgement until the end...

I have a kind of weird obsession with cartoon characters. Particularly male cartoon characters who are badasses. I think watching cartoons is what stimulated the type of heroes I gravitate toward. My favorites are always the ones who jump into a situation without a plan and can pull off snarky dialogue. Let's take a peek.

#1) Raphael from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Described in the theme song as "cool but crude". He's highly aggressive and prone to wanting to kill Foot Soldiers. While he doesn't challenge the leadership of his brother Leonardo, he often quips about Leo's decisions and he has a soft spot for the youngest turtle, Michaelangelo. Let's put aside for a moment the very weird fact that he's a turtle. For all his dark emotions, deep down, he really feels loyal to those he loves and he'd go out of his way to protect them.

#2) Wolverine from X-Men: The Animated Series (1992) - This one's human anyway. Another one of those guys with a serious attitude. Funny, but somehow I always think of Canadians as cute and cuddly. Well, maybe the cuddly part is right, but there's nothing cute about a guy with razor sharp claws that spring from his fists. There's a lot I could say about the way Hugh Jackman portrays Wolvie in the movies, but the cartoon on FOX was what first drew me to this hero. He's a loner with a mysterious past. Come to find out, he's actually quite old and the reason he likes being alone is because every women he ever loved died horribly. There's something about a sad man that makes my heart go "awww". In spite of the fact that  he goes around making enemies and killing people and sometimes going feral. It could happen to any of us. Well, it could.

#3) Gambit from  X-Men: The Animated Series (1992) - Oy, don't get me started on Gambit from Wolverine. Sure, that guy was cute, but he was not my idea of Gambit. Thing thing that drew me to Gambit was his charm. I'm a sucker for an accent; it will get me every time. I loved his infatuation with Rogue, even though she denied him at every turn. Obviously he has a shady background, what with being raised by thieves and all, but he's the kind of man you call to cover your butt in a fight. Witty, good-looking and full of Southern charm, he can join my team any time.

#4) Matt from from Digimon Adventure (1999) - Let's just say I had a lot of free time in the afternoons while I was in college. I would sit around watching afternoon cartoons and I discovered this geeky anime cartoon similar to Pokemon, which I never could stand. It was eight misfit kids battling evil with weird digital monsters. It's a bad premise, thank God they had decent characters. My favorite was Matt, this tough blond-haired, blue-eyed kid who had a stubborn streak and looked out for his little brother, T.K. He's not the leader of the group and sometimes clashes with Tai, who is the leader, because Tai tends to be a little reckless. I think that's why I liked Matt. He had a good head on his shoulders: he grew up to be an astronaut.

#5) Jonah Hex (2010) - Erm, I ran out of cartoon characters. Sorry. So I decided to go with a stand by and pick a movie character since all of these other guys appeared in movies. He was in some Batman cartoon and featured in Jonah Hex: Motion Comics with Jim Cummings as the voice, he's sort of a cartoon dude. I haven't seen it, but Jim Cummings does awesome voices, just sayin'. So basically what I know about this man is based on the movie which did very poorly in the box office. Probably because it was western-ish and the world has fallen out of love with westerns. I had to beg my husband to let us see this in the theater. Anyway, in the movie, Jonah is scarred and left for dead after he kills his war buddy and war buddy's powerful, angry daddy finds out. Supposedly, angry daddy dies, but then Jonah finds out he's still alive and about to wreak havoc on the U.S. of A. So he sets out to get his revenge because he couldn't save his family in the first place, but it's best served cold, or so they say. Ignore Megan Fox, she was only there to supply a healthy dose of boobage. If you want to save that movie poster, open it in Paint and scribble her face out, that will work just fine. My favorite lines from this movie are these (courtesy of
Dumbass outlaw: Hey, Hex! What happened to your face?
[a gunshot blasts him through a window, and Hex lifts his hat off the bar, revealing his pistol]
Jonah Hex: Cut myself shaving, what happened to yours?

There you have my cartoon preferences and a plus one. You don't even have to examine them very hard to see that they're pretty much the same person with a different face and the one's a turtle.

Happy Thanksgiving!