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Why I Didn't Love One Day

It was bound to happen--I'd stumble on a movie I for sure didn't like. It happens to be One Day, starring Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess. I read on the Redbox description that it was the "most romantic movie of the year". Compared to what? Seriously, I think Tucker and Dale vs. Evil had a more romantic feel.

I'm going to break the rule and spoil the move for you right now. So if you don't want to know the supposed climax of the movie, you might skip this paragraph. Anne's character Emma gets hit by a bus in the opening scenes. It's been my experience in movies that women riding bicycles die. So stop riding bicycles in romantic movies if you want to live a long and healthy life with your soul mate. I mean, what was the point of foreshadowing her death like that? It felt pointless to me. I didn't dislike the movie because she died, I disliked it because of the way the "romance" unfolded.

If you skipped that paragraph, let me start by telling you the next scene. Emma and Dexter went to school together, but didn't hang out. As they leave their graduation (or a party, I can't tell, but they seemed kind of drunk, so must've been a party), they decide to hook up. Emma goes to the bathroom and tries to get her nerves together, then comes back to find Dex about to leave. Instead, they cuddle up together and talk about July 15th, St. Swithun's Day (never heard of it until now).

One of the things that irked me so much is how the movie progressed years at a time. This made it feel more like a plot-driven movie instead of character-driven, which is how I prefer my stories and movies. One day they're graduating and the next scene is Emma moving to London while Dex is going to India. The next thing I know, he's living in Paris and she's working at a Mexican restaurant.

They get together for a vacation in Paris and Emma applies some rules like no flirting with her or other women, no skinning dipping, etc. Well, he does flirt and they do end up skinny dipping and they also tell each other that they think they might have had a relationship together except he isn't ready. He's hosting a TV show and is sort of the host that everyone loves to hate. Which leads him down a path toward drugs and wild lifestyle.

While they continue to maintain their friendship, they go in different paths. Emma shacks up with a guy she worked with at the Mexican restaurant, but isn't happy with him. She writes a book and kicks him out. She runs into Dex occassionally and finally at her former roommate's wedding, he tells her he's getting married and has a baby on the way.

He works hard to be a father, husband and has become a chef. His wife leaves him and he and Emma have a one night stand, which they don't bother to show you in the movie. Emma, now living in Paris, is dating a jazz musician. Dex comes to stay with her and she tells him that they can't be together, it was for one night. As he's getting ready to go back home, she runs to him and they decide to be a couple. They end up married and when she tells him she wants to have his baby, I swear it's the best part of the movie. They should've started the entire movie from the point where Emma and Dex were in love. The rest was a snore-a-thon.

Then there's a terrible black moment, if you skipped the paragraph above. In the end, Dex's dad gives him some good advice and he takes it to heart. Then we get to do some flashbacks that show how Emma and Dex decided to be friends. Really, why not just reverse the entire movie and go backwards rather than forwards?

Ugh. C-. Not romantic. Seriously, the best part was when they were happy together as a married couple. It did have a few funny lines (thank you, annoying boyfriend Ian, for the little gem: I miss you here. (holding the center of his chest) Or it might be trapped wind.).

Go spend your Redbox money on something else. Trust me.